Darkest Hours of the Gleeful
by Working Class Wildcard
Summary: Short drabbles, mostly poems, about the most sobering moment of the characters of Glee. Read it if you want a downer. Rated T for no other reason than sadness.
1. Tina

**A/N: Hey Gleeks hey.**

**So, yeah. I've been feeling a little down lately. So down that I honestly don't feel like going into all that right now, on the internet. Therefore, I decided to share my feelings through others. This is every one of the Glee Club member (and, of course, some important extras) darkest, most sobering hour.**

**Warning: I'll just slap a label on this baby right now. IT IS DEPRESSING.**

**Anyone who knows me knows I always take requests. Well, not for this one. Sorry guys. I just need to get this stuff out on my own. Before anyone asks, this is my outlet for all my emotions. I'm using a positive one, I promise.**

**So, yeah, um….enjoy?**

* * *

Tina

I'm the girl who is lost in space, the girl who is disappearing always, forever fading away and receding farther and farther into the background. Just like the Cheshire cat, someday I will suddenly leave, but the artificial warmth of my smile, that phony, clownish curve, the kind you see on the miserably sad people and villains in Disney movies, will remain behind as an ironic remnant. I am the girl you see in a photograph from some party someplace or in some park, the one who is in fact soon to be gone. When you look at the picture again, I assure you, I will no longer be there. I will be erased from history, like a traitor in the Soviet Union. Because with every day that goes by, I feel myself becoming more and more invisible…


	2. Santana

Santana

Others imply that they know what it is to be depressed because they have gone through a divorce, lost a job, or have broken up with someone. But these experiences carry with them feelings. Depression, instead, is flat, hollow, and unendurable. It is also tiresome. People cannot abide being around you when you are depressed. They might think that they ought to, might even try, but you know that you are tedious beyond belief: you are irritable and paranoid and humorless and lifeless and critical and demanding and no reassurance is ever enough.

You're frightened , and you're frightening, and you're not at all like yourself, but you will be soon, but you know you won't.


	3. Finn

Finn

There is a particular kind of pain, elation, loneliness, and terror involved in this kind of madness. When you're high, it's tremendous. The ideas are fast and frequent like shooting stars, and you follow them until you find better and brighter ones. Your reservations are outdone by the sudden talent to actually do things _right._ You find wonder in the simplest of things. You see the potential in everything around you, and you want to make it better, and make it better now. The radiance of the stars bring with them an vigor, one you've never felt before. You feel on top of the world, as if you could take on anything, everything.

That is when you try to.

You try to do everything without thinking or planning, because the maps that wrote themselves up in your head can do all the work for you. You just need to follow the ideas in your head, and never doubt them. Never check them, or give them a second look. Just go for it. The surge as at its tip top, and yet little progress is made. The lightning is pumping through you a little too fast, and patience is altogether gone.

Then the flood of power ends.

The high is over.

And all you're left with is a mental hangover and countless failures due to hasty attempts and impatience.

It's just…gone.

No warning, no preperation, and you're not even given the sweet numbness of true pain.

There's just hurt.

There's a hole right where the power was.

And you feel empty.


	4. Rachel

Rachel

I compare myself with my former self, not with others. Not only that, I tend to compare my current self with the best that I have been, which is mildly manic. When I am my present 'normal' self, I am far removed from when I have been my liveliest, most productive, most intense, most outgoing, and efficient.

In sort, for myself, I am a hard act to follow.


	5. David

David

Manic-depression twists your state of mind and contemplations, rouses tragic actions, destroys the normal way of thinking everyone else is programmed with, and much too often eats away at the desire and will to live. The natural human fire that burns within all of us is, both literally and metophorically, blown out without warning or second thoughts. It is an illness that is biological in its origins, yet one that that feels the mental in the experience of it, and illness that is unique in deliberating benefit and pleasure, yet brings in its wake almost insufferable grief, and, not uncommonly, suicide.

It's funny, the way that they call it an illness.

Yet there is no work to find a cure for me.


End file.
